The still small voice

We talked about silence in small group tonight. Once again, I am amazed at God's timing. If I could describe my life in three words at the moment, it would be, "out of control." Somehow I managed to go from not having any friends here in Boulder, to being over-involved in my community, in approximately 3.5 seconds flat. Or at least it feels that way. I remember sitting on my balcony on a warm Saturday afternoon this past fall, reading a book and watching the world pass by, wondering why I used to think the weekends went by too fast. I had all the time in the world.

These days, it feels like my waking hours spent at home consist of 30 minute intervals where I'm changing clothes, grabbing dinner, and heading out the door to my next activity. I'm trying to buy a townhouse (if only the seller would SIGN THE CONTRACT), leading small groups on Tues and Thurs nights, training for a triathlon with Team in Training, and trying to keep up with my friends as we trek through the snowy mountains.

And I'm having a blast. But I can't help but wonder if I'm not missing out on something. In my attempt to fill the void of loneliness this past fall, I think I have tipped the scales a bit too far in the other direction. And I wonder what my week would look like if I took a bit more time to myself. If I sought out some intentional solitude. If I spent some time (gasp) in silence.

I intentionally didn't turn on the radio as I drove home from church tonight. And I didn't turn it on when I got home, either. I turned off my cell phone. I read a book. And even though I know I should get some sleep, I can't help but want to sit on this couch alittle longer and soak up this delicious silence. God may have created us to be relational beings, but I also believe that he created stillness, and that he speaks to us in that "still small voice of calm." I just wish I spent more time listening.